Raccoon If You Ran Like Your Mouth Youd Be In Good Shape Shirts
The cardboard box overflowed. “Raccoon If You Ran Like Your Mouth You’d Be In Good Shape” shirts, a monument to a bygone era. Each one, a faded echo of inside jokes and questionable decisions. There was the neon green one from Sarah’s 21st, stained with what I hoped was just beer. Another, ripped at the seam, courtesy of an overly enthusiastic mosh pit.
Holding the soft cotton, I was transported. Late-night diner runs, spontaneous road trips, disastrous attempts at stand-up comedy – each shirt a tangible memory. We were invincible then, fueled by cheap pizza and boundless optimism. Now, packing tape and bubble wrap replaced spontaneity, adulthood a heavy, inescapable box. A pang of sadness hit me. Would these shirts be relics of a life I’d left behind, or a reminder to keep a little bit of that raccoon-mouthed energy alive?
EXPRESS DELIVERY
We have express delivery method, however to ensure accurate delivery time we only support customers who contact us before ordering. And if you have any questions please let us know by emailing us at [email protected]
T-SHIRT
- 100% Cotton
- Made in the USA and Imported
- Pull On closure
- Machine Wash
- Material – 100% cotton dad tshirts for men.
- Available Sizes: S, M, L, XL, 2XL, 3XL, 4XL.
The graphic print in our shirts are printed in the USA; with using fine quality fade resistant inks and latest printing techniques that ensure a long-lasting and vibrant finish. We include everyone! Please check our size chart image to find the best fit for you and your loved ones. Note: Design may look smaller in bigger sizes.
SWEATSHIRT
- 8 oz./yd² (US) 13.3 oz./L yd (CA), 50/50 cotton/polyester
- Heather Sport colors: 60/40 polyester/cotton
- Safety Green: Compliant with ANSI / ISEA 107
- Classic fit
- Air jet yarn for softer feel and reduced pilling
- Double-needle stitching at shoulders, armholes, neck, waistband and cuffs
- 1×1 rib with spandex for enhanced stretch and recovery
- Tear away label
WHY CHOOSE US?
We believe in making a t-shirt you actually want to wear. We do not sell cheap scratchy tees here. You’ll notice the quality right when you put it on.
Some more important facts about us:
- Our tees are high quality and made to fit right. They are slightly fitted so you don’t look like you’ve put a dress on












