Blood Stains Are Red Ultraviolets Are Blue I Watch Enough Murder Shows Shirts
The pizza guy, a nervous kid with acne, arrived at my door clutching two steaming boxes. “Uh, Johnson?” he stammered, avoiding eye contact. “Two larges, pepperoni and… pineapple?” Pineapple? I hadn’t ordered that.
“Actually, I only ordered the pepperoni,” I said, confusion wrinkling my brow. He paled. “Oh god, I’m so sorry! I mixed up the addresses. Mrs. Henderson next door…”
Suddenly, Mrs. Henderson, a sweet old lady with a floral dress, emerged from *her* doorway. “Oh, there you are! I thought I heard…” She trailed off, her eyes widening as she took in the pizza guy, then me, and finally, my t-shirt: “Blood Stains Are Red, Ultraviolets Are Blue, I Watch Enough Murder Shows…”
A beat of silence. Then, a chuckle. “Oh, you must be new to the neighborhood! I was just telling Ethel about your… interesting hobbies. Don’t worry dear,” she said, patting my arm. “We all have our quirks.” She grabbed the pineapple pizza. “Come on in, dear, I’ll tell you all about my true crime podcast obsession.”
EXPRESS DELIVERY
We have express delivery method, however to ensure accurate delivery time we only support customers who contact us before ordering. And if you have any questions please let us know by emailing us at [email protected]
T-SHIRT
- 100% Cotton
- Made in the USA and Imported
- Pull On closure
- Machine Wash
- Material – 100% cotton dad tshirts for men.
- Available Sizes: S, M, L, XL, 2XL, 3XL, 4XL.
The graphic print in our shirts are printed in the USA; with using fine quality fade resistant inks and latest printing techniques that ensure a long-lasting and vibrant finish. We include everyone! Please check our size chart image to find the best fit for you and your loved ones. Note: Design may look smaller in bigger sizes.
SWEATSHIRT
- 8 oz./yd² (US) 13.3 oz./L yd (CA), 50/50 cotton/polyester
- Heather Sport colors: 60/40 polyester/cotton
- Safety Green: Compliant with ANSI / ISEA 107
- Classic fit
- Air jet yarn for softer feel and reduced pilling
- Double-needle stitching at shoulders, armholes, neck, waistband and cuffs
- 1Ă—1 rib with spandex for enhanced stretch and recovery
- Tear away label
WHY CHOOSE US?
We believe in making a t-shirt you actually want to wear. We do not sell cheap scratchy tees here. You’ll notice the quality right when you put it on.
Some more important facts about us:
- Our tees are high quality and made to fit right. They are slightly fitted so you don’t look like you’ve put a dress on












